CONQUERING THE PAIN OF INFIDELITY:

 

 

HOW DO I OVERCOME THE HURT?

 

 

With much prayer and faith in Jesus Christ, the pain of infidelity can be overcome. Another essential component in the overcoming process is forgiveness. Everyone who gets married, want their marriage to work, for some, at any cost. However, for others this is not the case. If that trust has been violated, if the injured spouse can’t get beyond the pain, if the love they shared has diminished, they may be unwilling to invest anything else into the marriage. Even though they must forgive, divorce may still be eminent.

 

 Below are two testimonies with two different outcomes on overcoming the hurt of infidelity. One where the marriage ended, the other where the marriage was saved. In both cases the injured spouses were healed. One spouse forgave and was able to move on with their life after divorce, the other the injured spouse forgave and was able to save their marriage. Both injured spouses overcame the hurt through obedience of the Word of God and faith in Jesus Christ.

 

Also shown below is a testimony from one who committed the act of infidelitly. This testimony is entitled, "The Consequences of Infidelity." It reveals that actions have consequences. It is enlightening.

 

Infidelity defined:

 

Infidelity (also referred to as cheating, adultery, or having an affair) is the subjective feeling that one's partner has violated a set of rules or relationship norms and this violation results in feelings of sexual jealousy and rivalry (Leeker & Carlozzi, 2012). The violation can be sexual in nature, for example, involving kissing, sexual fondling, or sex with another individual outside of the relationship.

What constitutes an act of infidelity is dependent upon the exclusivity expectations within the relationship (Barta & Kiene, 2005). In marital relationships, exclusivity expectations are commonly assumed although they are not always met. When they are not met, research has found that particular psychological damage including feelings of rage and betrayal, lowering of sexual and personal confidence, and damage to self-image can occur (Leeker et al., 2012).

 

Personal Testimony on “Infidelity”

 

I must say that infidelity is one of the most hurtful things any one could ever experience in a life time. I experienced this hurt of infidelity in a previous marriage. As a Christian, I never expected infidelity from my spouse.  After 15 years of marriage I found out later that over half of our marriage my spouse was cheating on me. There were signs of infidelity, but I refused to think evil of my spouse.

 

My spouse was going out with friends to movies and dinners, but when I talk to the friends that my spouse “supposedly” went out with they did not know anything about the movies or dinners. This went on for a while before I became suspicious, but in spite of my suspicion I continued to be loving, with much prayer. I would call home from work to check to see how everyone was, talking to the kids and then asking to speak to my spouse who was not home (three hour late), this happen several times.

 

My spouse left me after being caught in several lies and took the kids also. I came in from work to find our home almost emptied of most of our furniture. Needless to say this caught me by surprise in spite of the signs.

 

I overcame the hurt because much prayer was made for me. I was not ashamed to talk about my situation to trusted friends. This helped me to overcome. Along with much time spent with God, I was able to go forward with my life, Hallelujah. Today, I enjoy marital bliss with a God-sent spouse. To God be the glory.

 

Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose.

                                                                                         The Preacher

 

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Dr. J. G. Johnson

Issues of Life Conquered